Brace yourself or cover your eyes NOW!!

hard to love you.

2010-04-17T09:45:00.000+08:00

Why do they make it hard to love you?
Why can't they even start to try?
'Cause now I feel a bridge is burning
And all the smoke is in my eyes

I realize I never let them know me
I always wanted to be right
Took a mistake to really show me
Exactly what they were like

I've been wrong but I've been changing
I've been wondering what to do
Here I am alone and waiting
For you

Why do I try and make them happy?
Why am I always playing nice?
It isn't easy trying to tell you
Exactly what's on my mind

nothing is what it seems without you.

2010-04-15T07:07:00.002+08:00

sad..

i love this movie, i cried when charlie died. :(

probably why i developed a love for pocket watches.

i tear my heart open, i sew myself shut
and my weakness is that i care too much
and my scars remind me that the past is real
i tear my heart open just to feel

wtf

2010-04-15T07:03:00.004+08:00

one last puzzle.

batman son of superman..

church wars

omg! an arcanine in real life.

go away.. no please stay..
what am i gonna do with all this time i set aside for you
like im supposed to know, you were all alone

night time

2010-04-15T07:03:00.001+08:00

You mean that much to me
And it’s hard to show
Gets hectic inside of me
When you go
Can I confess these things to you
I don’t know
Embedded in my chest
And it hurts to hold

I couldn’t spill my heart
My eyes gleam
Looking in from the dark
I walk out in stormy weather
Hope my words keep us together
Steady walking but bound to trip
Should release but just tighten my grip

Night time sympathize
I’ve been working on white lies
So I’ll tell the truth
I’ll give it up to you
And when the day comes
It will have all been fun
We’ll talk about it soon

I couldn’t spill my heart
My eyes gleam
Looking in from the dark
I walk out in stormy weather
Hope my words keep us together
Steady walking but bound to trip
Should release but just tighten my grip

Night time sympathize
I’ve been working on white lies
So I’ll tell the truth
I’ll give it up to you
And when the day comes
It will have all been fun
We’ll talk about it soon

her morning elegance.

2010-04-14T00:33:00.000+08:00

run to the water.

2010-04-13T23:26:00.002+08:00

"your heart skipped a beat. and when i caught it, you were out of reach."

at first i thought i could go through with this,
and i really wanted it to,
i was even prepared to tell you,
doesn't matter to me what happens,
as long as at the end of the day you knew who you'd go back to.
yes it'd be torture, but least i'd have gotten to see you.
you would have brighten my day like a star...
but as much as i like you, neither the pain nor guilt wouldn't stop tearing at me.

heh, it's sad that people around us don't trust
either of us enough to let us talk or meet.
its sad, we're all like little lost kids.

you're probably angry and i know doing this would probably kill any chance of us happening but sometimes the hardest thing and right are the same.

sometimes i wish i were more selfish
sometimes i wish i were more bastardy
sometimes i wish i were more in control
sometimes i wish i were more heartless

i'm sorry but too bad, i'm not.
i'm sorry but too bad, things had to turn out like this.

i really don't know what is going to happen now
i'm not sure how you feel anymore, about me, about this
and i don't know how many people i've offended anymore.

i think i’m losing where you end and i begin,
its all a blur.

maybe we're not meant for this,
maybe we're better off alone.
and if i'm honest,
i would tell you i'm missing you,
come back and haunt me.

i didn't mean to fall in love with you
and baby there's a name for what you put me through
it isn't love, it's robbery
i'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me.

killing yourself to live

2010-04-13T11:30:00.000+08:00

occam's razor

2010-04-07T05:57:00.001+08:00

entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem

now, you explain it to me.

and to the victor goes the spoils.

bury me

2010-04-07T05:55:00.001+08:00

three strikes to entropia

2008-12-02T12:12:00.002+08:00

crush me all you want
i'll never bow to you
the pain of salvation

king of loss
you only want to hear me say what you want to hear me say

honor thy father and mother

this time you've gone too far
time for idioglossia

of apples and oranges

2008-05-31T15:06:00.003+08:00

i wish i had a money printer in my basement

to quote rooney
'fucking beauty'

things i'll never say

2008-05-22T04:53:00.000+08:00

For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are those 'It might have been'

testing of the messing

2008-05-19T14:04:00.005+08:00

haha

it hurts so bad

it works

free advertising,
but for whom ?

shhh..

2006-04-22T23:55:00.000+08:00

ah yes

the first time i got a bike ride

my friend got into an accident

and spent a day on a hospital bed

i feel so.. jealous

yea thats right.

2nd boss: darek ?
darek : sir ?
2nd boss: bzzt* darek ?
darek : sir ?
2nd boss: bzzt* darek ?
darek : yes sir?
2nd boss: bzzt* hi
darek : err.. hi

-fast forward-

2nd boss: bzzt* mandeep got bzzt* accident you know bzzzt*?
darek : huh ? no! what happened ?!
2nd boss: bzzt* he tongbang you just now ?
darek : ya but nothing happened
2nd boss: ohh bzzt* so its after he drop you la, you okbzzt* ?
darek : yea im not hurt
2nd boss: bzzt* know tml got to come back right ? bzzt* coming ?
darek : ya 8.30 i know
2nd boss : bzzt* bye

-click-

darek: y.. right.

uh huh.

no rest for the wicked

don't tell dad,
don't wanna let the world know ;)

the songs are in your eyes
i see them when you smile..
i've seen enough.
im not giving up..

not giving up on you..

the sweetest thing.

2006-04-19T22:39:00.000+08:00

hahaha
god dam son of a retarded monkey with two left toes

i accidentally stapled my left middle finger
and paper cut my right middle finger

arghh
now i can't point them!

can ya see me ?
im in the first line of the ass,
i mean s,
the one with the seductive sleeping buddha pose

damn i miss my squad,
probably put up more when im
feeling less lazzy.

and
you're the closest to heaven
that i'll ever be..

undone.

2006-04-18T23:44:00.000+08:00

sighz
2 of my old hard disks crashed
a lot of lovable junk was in there : /

typical conversation:
ps: before i had the ops
Gerrad: and we'll he clairifed things with me
Gerrad: so u coming ?
Darek : and we;; he ?
Darek : we'll he
Darek : not sure
Darek : my guys still blur
Darek : eyes
Darek : LOL
Gerrad: *well
Gerrad: tight
Darek : MY GUYS
Gerrad: *RIGHT
Darek : right
Gerrad: my guys eh

it don't make any sense as far as i can tell.

you take a lot of chances with your feelings,
no one really knows what you feel.
and fiction is the only way you're dealing,
you turn your pretty head if it gets real.

you take it so slowly,
and your eyes look so lonely
and it's only..
will you think about me.
oh yeah, will you think about me
think about me.

i didn't say it was your fault.
i said i was going to blame you.

yea, sing while im losing

2006-04-18T00:06:00.000+08:00

barber: why so tired ? you student ah ?
darek : nope, adult
barber: you got a got a good body ah, army ?
darek : no la in police, we're all slackers
barber: wa you got work out a lot ?
darek : haha, no la we're sleeping most of the time
barber: fit ah
darek : actually i can't run, how much ?
barber: you must be tired, 10 bucks

ok so i paid 10 bucks for the compliment

shuddap

and i'll stay with you.
take my hand now..
these walls will fall before we do..

will you think about me ?

follow me there.. a beautiful somewhere..

2006-04-16T23:53:00.000+08:00

Your true color is Yellow!

You're yellow, the color of joy and energy — two things you definitely
bring to everyone around you. It's hard for anyone to be sad or
lonely in your presence; your sunny disposition and cheery outlook
just won't allow it. The warmth of your personality shines through in
the kindness you show friends and family (and strangers, too). Always
ready with a lighthearted joke or heartfelt compliment, you know how
to make people feel good about themselves, so they can't get enough
of you.
Yellow is a warm and inviting color for a warm and inviting person — you!

What's Your True Color?

Your movie star double is Will Smith

A joker like you needs to be played by someone charming, someone who
isn't afraid to get a little silly — but someone who always knows the difference
between being outrageous and being obnoxious. That's why Will Smith would
be perfect for the part. With his dazzling smile, addictive laugh, and great
comedic timing, people would immediately identify with the
lighthearted fun you bring to this world.
Like Will, you love laughing — and making other people laugh, too.

Back in school, were you the one making prank phone calls
or organizing spoofs of all the teachers?
Sure you've matured at least a little bit since then,
but you've still probably got that 14-carat sense of humor.
Because of that, you're probably the center of attention at parties,
as friends gather to hear you making a mockery of everything
from current events to the computer-illiterate idiot who sits next to you at work.
You, like Will, don't want to take life too seriously, and that's what will
shine through if the Fresh Prince of comedy plays you in the movie of your life.

Who's Your Movie Star Double?

yea you know it.

just for the record,
on executing my very first assigned task,
i jammed the bloody copier

theres you and me
and all of the people..
and i don't know why..
i can't keep my eyes off of you..

blinded, a thousand points of light

2006-03-12T20:08:00.000+08:00

i have to ask if,
anyone ever notices this
at the bottom ?

i am mad while you are not,
you have fleas while i do not
sing a song of the flying rabbits
grooving away to a far away beat
then you see what cannot be,
turtles sing when mice should flee
Out of mangoes, out of mind,
dance with me till you are fine.

Andrew: woot
Andrew: I just used my mastercard for the first time
Andrew: I'm a man now.
debian_: what u buy
Andrew: purse

[sp00n06] i don't get math
[vinyard] you get even?
[sp00n06] ??

minadein: so my materials lecturer at uni is like
minadein: "this year we will be focusing on failure"
minadein: "for those who are repeating the subject, this will be new to you"

@jjsff8: I wanna find a girl who loves me for my money,
but doesnt understand math.

Nickster: Time for me to make some breakfast! :)
Nickster: Is anyone from England? I have a question.
Speck: Im from England and if your asking about english muffins Ill kick you.
Nickster: nvm then.

sorry isn't an excuse when you do something stupid on purpose

look down

2006-03-05T11:37:00.000+08:00

then,
and,
with,
reference
to the previous post,

look down somemore

no
really

down

your toes

yes

you

now.

and so the boy prayed, head tilted towards the heavens..

2006-03-05T11:14:00.000+08:00

sometimes..

just sometimes..

i wish..

and i wish..

and i wish you would..

and i wish i would..

then i realise,
i can't..

i learnt to hide my thoughts..
behind these truthful lies..

ijoasdjinpga

2006-02-26T18:06:00.000+08:00

mm

im getting lazy

ah and i learnt to speak 'gay'

apeloverage: my friend was fired from his job in a sex shop
apeloverage: when his boss found evidence that he'd been
looking at bus timetables on his work computer

@Wally: stupid muslims promise virgins
@Wally: if they promised lightsabers I'd be on my way to mecca
@Wally: I can hang out with virgins on IRC

and he told me.. what fate had in stalled for him..
and i said to him.. and then..?

under the moonlight

2006-02-19T18:34:00.000+08:00

sighz

i'll wait here to play you a song tonight..

like a flower in the rain..

so soft and all alone..

you'll be under the pale..

under the pale moonlight..

only but a reflection of heaven so far away..

onward to the next level !

2006-01-25T01:47:00.000+08:00

looks familiar ?

HAHAHAHAHAHAA

RamaWURK: THe first few hours of work
RamaWURK: Just drag on

Jato: Hey Rama.

The_Orichalcon: Rama, play "What's that noise"
The_Orichalcon: it helps pass the time

Jato: How do you play "What's that noise"

The_Orichalcon: you listen for a little while, and try to hear a noise that you can't quite make out
The_Orichalcon: then you go around finding out what's making the noise
The_Orichalcon: or the multiplayer version
The_Orichalcon: if you have mates that are bored

RamaWURK: lol

The_Orichalcon: they make some noises
The_Orichalcon: and you have to find out where and what they are

Jato: TO, you are on a whole other level of boredom.

yea me too..

i wished you would've loved me too
now im destined to spend my time missing you

there is no if..

2006-01-01T20:17:00.000+08:00

its damn fun
like some summer camp

the night before we moved
our whole bunk played wrestling
we shifted the double deckers
and dumped like 10 beds in the center
and began a
'free for all',' royal rumble'
i got knocked out by a double submission move,
someone did a finger four leg lock and an arm lock,
anyways it was all fixed,
so there'b a winner,
the championship belt, which was in actual fact
the police belt..

we told ghost stories,
gambled,
played charades,
held debates,
and god knows what else

the dumb thing is
when i tot i was done with studying
i gotta go back to mugging again
the notes on the law module and the police procedures
are thicker than my toes combined

goddammit

Grid: Hey Psyko, if the world was gonna end in 3 minutes, what would you do?
Psyko: I'D SCREW ANYTHING THAT MOVES!!! What would you do?
Grid: ... ... ... I'd stand very very still. o.o;

and i give up forever to touch you
cos i know you feel me somehow..

heavenseeker, after forever

2005-12-25T19:55:00.000+08:00

arm to solve,
kill to save...

heh
you,
in making me love what i hate
make me hate myself..

now i know what my walking style,
unique to myself,
is called..

its the 'wtf walking style'
quoted off bitchkid

i can't imagine me being a cop
i know..

neither can you

start running kiddies

arm to kill, kill to live
god how could I believe...

gentlemen,
the army train you to become men,
but we are different,
we don't train you to become men,
we train to become POLICE men

put a bullet thru my head, so i could lie on my bed

2005-12-16T23:50:00.000+08:00

i never knew i could hit almost,
not counting the shitload of other
things i had to do,
700 push ups
in 11 hours

shiok
can't
wait
to
start
arresting
people

yea
you
know
who you are

my soul screams sorrow
all is lost
as i shiver for tomorrow

i am despair
the cries of the abandoned child
the pain of the battered beast
the screams of the souls you keep
i am..
i..

am
bound by fate..

yea eye rolling exercises

2005-12-12T00:12:00.000+08:00

haha i had to dig this thread out

its a damn stupid thread spanning more than a year
Continuous Story

this is pretty good too, Spam
mainly cos i was getting flamed

you should be able to guess who i am

or your an idiot

and i want to get free talk to me
i can feel you falling
and i wanted to be all you need
somehow here is gone

maybe someday i'll know
why i wasn't meant for you

hexed

2005-10-24T18:08:00.000+08:00

god damn asshole

my nose won't stop bleeding
since since i woke up..
6 hours ago
and im sure the accompanying headache
isn't a tumor

some bitch musta hexed me

'we're gonna die'
come on be positive..
'we're gonna die, quickly'

the ashes danced
while the wind sung to him
as he screamed to the heavens
your love will be the death of me..

so surreal, im in denial ?

2005-10-08T06:48:00.000+08:00

uh huh

few days ago
there was this heavy downpour in my area
so the weather being nice
i decided to go down for a stroll
that was at about 3 or 4 a.m

now that the backdrops set,
on with the story

theres this sheltered walk way near my house
which i had to walk thru to get to the next block
and since it raining,
it was WET,

the weird thing was....
there were foot prints on the floor of the walk way
by foot prints,
i mean bare footed foot prints
and the pouring started bout 5-10 mins ago
which translates into
some maniac just ran thru this patch less than 10 mins ago
in the cold, all wet
of cos i looked around to find this 'person'
but there was not a body in sight

onto the next block,
there was this funeral opposite where the walk way was
with the foot prints leading there
being the err observerist i am, ahem,
i decide to .. observe
sitting there for 1/2 a hour
with my bottle of beer
there was either no bloody person watching over the funeral
or i accidentally mistook the bottle of vodka for heineken

put two and two together,
theres a thought
now you decide

ahh,
veritas vos liberabit

duhh

2005-10-07T02:25:00.000+08:00

excellent seems like im dying
and those who do know why,
know why

and lookie where im going !

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Eigth Level of Hell - the Malebolge!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Low
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Moderate
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Very High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very High
Level 7 (Violent)	High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Extreme
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	High

Take the Dante's" Inferno Test

if there is life after death,
there is no death..
and if death does not exist,
we do not live

run..runn... HMG WTF RUNNN

2005-10-05T00:57:00.000+08:00

shiok !

moms back less than a week and she sets fire to kitchen..
thank the monkey tat sits on my head i was there..

-HEADLINE NEWS-

*MOM SETS FIRE TO KITCHEN, INNOCENT SON RUSHES FOR MASHMALLOWS*

*B2 Sick Of Playing Second Banana*

*Terror Suspected in 2 Russian Jet Crashes*

*Loose Lips Sink Ship*

*Teddy Roosevelt Allows Three Others to be Carved into Mountain*

ok im gettign carried away again..

why would i take it too far

with not thinking about the end at all

if a fortune could say what the future will bring

then im not convinced

its ending in tragedy

and most of all

its in my control

to end it all..

und ich hab nichts gesagt

2005-09-15T06:14:00.000+08:00

your fuck.

What swear word are you?

and nothing, i said..

all you'll feel is just a tickle

2005-09-14T02:29:00.000+08:00

said he to me,
right im sure, thought i to myself
a 'plug' he picked
size this -> '...' ( or so)
with his tweezers wield
he said to me
look up look up,
i felt it stick down my eye
one by one
for 3 plugs to 2 eyes
tearing (not crying),
i though to myself
woe was me,
thought i to myself
tickle ?
i was clearly not amused..
it hurts ?
sounded he, slightly bemused
ughh, groan i
don't blink, said he
i

long story short,
i don't tear/cry/sob whatever enough,
by that i mean
a 'drop of the clear salty saline solution secreted by the lacrimal glands',
you know what i mean,
so the surface of my eyes always tears,
by that i mean' tore a hole in my stocking' kind of tear,
there are about 4 tear ducts in each eye
with two at the bottom connecting to the nose

long story even shorter
i got some plugs sticking in my dam tear ducts
and it hurt like a dam anal probe

tatclass: YOU ALL SUCK DICK
tatclass: er.
tatclass: hi.
andy\code: A common typo.
tatclass: the keys are like right next to each other.

right,
follow me there,
a beautiful somewhere..

yes, don't make me kill you

2005-08-04T08:53:00.000+08:00

You scored as Wolverine. Wolverine is a loner, and a skilled fighter. He's got the hots for Jean Grey but a better fit for him would be Storm. He doesn't like to follow orders which pisses Cyclops off. He has terrible memories from the experimentation done on him at Weapon X. Even though he doesn't show it, he loves the X-Men. Powers: Fast healing and adamantium skeleton and claws.

Wolverine

80%

Iceman

75%

Gambit

70%

Colossus

70%

Emma Frost

65%

Rogue

65%

Storm

55%

Jean Grey

55%

Beast

50%

Nightcrawler

40%

Cyclops

40%

Most Comprehensive X-Men Personality Quiz 2.0

shiok

that explains why im so forgetful,

its not that im antisocial, im just not friendly.

wtf harry fricking potter

2005-08-04T08:34:00.000+08:00

You scored as Harry Potter. You can be a little reckless and hot-headed at times, but a more brave and courageous friend would be hard to find.

Harry Potter

75%

Sirius Black

70%

Draco Malfoy

70%

Remus Lupin

65%

Ginny Weasley

65%

Albus Dumbledore

65%

Severus Snape

60%

Lord Voldemort

60%

Ron Weasley

55%

Hermione Granger

45%

Your Harry Potter Alter Ego Is...?

shiok im almost 'serious black',
for - 'You wouldn't insult someone if you could help it.'
i put i highly disagree,
so now we know potters got a potty mouth too
and of cos,
everyone is entitled to my opinion

whoops

2005-07-22T02:38:00.000+08:00

those that cannot do teach,
those that cannot teach criticise
and those who are half blind,
somehow keep banging into females

i swear i didn't see anything
and i touched nothing

stargazr>
yeah, the only reason i have a tv is cause i won it in a book reading contest

close up these eyes,
try not to cry
all that i've got to pull me through
are memories of you..

next time you get the urge to think...don't..

2005-07-15T05:55:00.000+08:00

and then it hit me,
so sweetly and simply,
like punching a piano with my face,
its not how smart i can be,
its how others percieve it to be

you can have all the smarts in the world
and the other person can be a bush

the things i could have said to him

if idiots could fly this place would be a goddam airport

no, why don't you ask me again ?

2005-06-26T01:03:00.000+08:00

mann.,,
what would you like me to do..
why don't you tell me..
i mean afterall,
its always been bout you, you, you, you
why the change ?
its too lil too late now
you've gone tooo far..

mannn
would you/you all like a/an/and
a. a press conference
b. a q & a session
c. an interrogation
d. a bullet
e. a press conference

yeso no ?

don't turn to face me, i wont' say anything
don't say anything, i'm not listening
don't look at me, i don't want to see you

im the fella your mother warned you about

2005-06-14T05:46:00.001+08:00

defining darek - physically
13.
13 times.
13 times i've been stitched,
13 times in the head alone

oh oh oh, the sweetest thing..
you can sew it up but you still see the tear

understood..not

2005-05-15T07:23:00.000+08:00

these are my thoughts written down,
i write it down because it seems so hard to say it,
their my only savior,
from not saying what i really want to say,
these are the thoughts that are on my mind,
moments that haven't yet been defined,
and i don't know if you could ever understand,
but these are the things i can't say when we're alone..

where am i ?

2005-05-15T06:21:00.000+08:00

woo its been while..
like i said earlier everythings going to change,
its going to be a dam messy and weird year

don't bother saying it if you don't mean it,
cause i don't don't need it.

how did i get so stranded..
here i am.. built a house upon the sand
and i know im slipping away too fast..
slipping away..

how can i miss you if you won't go away?

2005-02-03T02:41:00.000+08:00

how would you live life if you only had a day left ?

mm
what would you do..
what would you say..
what would you feel..

why am i even doing homework ?!
haha..

as usual click for a higher resolution
looks like its coming outta my head eh..

why am i black ?
the flash just wasn't on

can you see tangs ?

someone is calling me..

heaven isn't far away..

heaven isn't far off and its calling ..

i knew all that i was suppose to know yet
i knew nothing at all

"Zwischen beiden Welten" ("Between both Worlds")

2005-02-03T01:07:00.000+08:00

mm sister sent..
read oon

Read Slowly...

Have you ever wondered which hurts the most?
Saying something and wishing you hadn't?, or
Saying nothing and wishing you had?

I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them.

If you do, they might break your heart...if you don't, you might break theirs.

Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't.
You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own........when you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.

Too many of us stay walled up because we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all.

Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle?

We tell lies when we are afraid... afraid of what we
don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us.

But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger.

Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump.

Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have done, or could have had.

*What would you do if every time you fell in love you had to say good-bye?

*What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be there?

*What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got to tell them how you felt? (even if it is that you don't care anymore)

*What would you do if you loved someone more than ever and you couldn't have them?

*What would you do if you never got the chance to say I am friends with all of my family and they know I love them?*

People live, but people die. I want to tell you that
you are a friend.

If you died tomorrow (God Forbid)

you would be in my heart.
Would I be in yours?

If you care about me as much as I care about you

you will send this back

You might be best friends one year, pretty good friends the next year, don't talk that often the next, and don't want to talk at all the year after that.

So, I just wanted to say, even if I never talk to you again in my life, you are special to me and you have made a difference in my life

just for the record,
i didn't send it back

Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken.
If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal.
Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements.
Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.
But in that casket--safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change.
It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.
To love is to be vulnerable.
~C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

the lil place in the corner of my head..

2005-01-25T01:50:00.000+08:00

i can't decide with one is more beautiful..

a sea of..

the calm before...

a swirl within..

floating..

thanks to alvin for letting me stay at his place,
holland village,
so these pictures could be taken..

P.s - right click and open link in a new window for a bigger resolution

humans often don't treasure what they have,
if they know they can have it easily

i guess this is it..

2005-01-25T01:39:00.000+08:00

i've always hated people leaving
cos it not always a certainty that they'll be back

i've always said 'see you' or 'catch you later' in place of 'good bye'
cos the last time i said good bye to a good friend,
he commited suicide the very same day
and it was really a 'good bye'..

mm their gone..
almost cried..
and everyone there thought i was as happy as an otter..
haha, lying to myself again
i don't know what to feel anymore..

i can only please one person each day.
today is not your day.
tomorrow isn't looking good for you either.

happiness ?

2005-01-19T03:43:00.000+08:00

what would you give for happiness ?
if i could i would too..

thought provoking picture..
life is short
no one lives forever
people die everyday
who knows him or me could be next
theres a tot, now you decide

i need a place to hide,
to release the pain out of my head,
on the edge of time,
all the scenes are falling behind,
it seems that alls is lost..
its hard to smile when i'm down
but i'll do the best i can
i will try to get out of this pain,
no more lies..
from now until the end of time...

my my, the things you think of..

keep looking around, there's always something you've missed..

do you feel lost ?

2005-01-19T03:20:00.000+08:00

added two new songs.. as usual side bar, go listen

will my soul ever rest in peace :

I've been searching for an oasis

In the desert for so long

In my weakness trying

To pretend I'm strong

I've been holding on

To things that I have left behind

I've been scared and lonely

I'm crippled inside

Bathed my soul in the starlight

Healed my wounds in the sun

Screamed my pain to the forest

Asking the question why?

[Chorus]

Will there come a time for me when I find peace of mind

Will I always have this feeling like I'm last in the line

I will climb up the mountain and light up the candle and ask:

"Will my soul ever rest in peace?"

[Chorus]

I've been washed in pain

Haunted by the ghosts of years ago

They won't leave me be

They keep coming back for more

[Chorus]

My crippled soul is yearning to be free

[Chorus]

4000 rainy nights:

These empty days are filling me with pain

After I left it seems my life is only rain

My heart is longing to the better times

When everything was still so fine

I wonder why it happens so fast

You give your heart away knowing it might not last

I'm still here waiting for the rain to fall

And to see you once again

4000 Rainy Nights

4000 Nights I'd be with you

4000 Rainy Nights with you

I keep your memory in my heart

You give me hope when everything is so dark

That thing nobody can take away

Forever in me

4000 Rainy...

A Pessimist is what an Optimist calls a Realist.

what are you feeling ?

2005-01-19T03:00:00.001+08:00

Girls will always think about the boys they could have had.
Guys will always think about the girls that they never had.

Difference between the one you like and the one you love:

In front of the person you like, your heart beats faster
But in front of the person you love, you get happy.

In front of the person you love, winter seems like spring.
But in front of the person you like, winter is just beautiful winter.

If you look into the eyes of the one you like, you blush.
But if you look into the eyes of the one you love, you smile.

In front of the person you like, you can't say everything on your mind.
But in front of the person you love, you can.

In front of the person you like, you tend to get shy.
But in front of the person you love, you can show your own self.

You can't look straight into the eyes of the one you like.
But you can always smile and stare into the eyes of the one you love.

But when the one you like is crying, you end up comforting.
When the one you love is crying, you cry with them.

The feeling of like starts from the ear.
But the feeling of love starts from the eye.

So if you stop liking a person you used to like,
all you need to do is cover your ears.
But if you try to close your eyes,
love turns into a drop of tear and remains in your heart forever

How true do u find it to be?

haha... i'll just keep smiling

if love is blind, how can we believe in love at first sight?
love cannot be forced, but it love can be nutured over time ?
thats stupid as it translates into
don't worry about forcing people into getting married,
even if they hate each others guts,
for initially they'll fight
but..
they'll love each other.. eventually..

the art of self deception

2005-01-18T00:56:00.000+08:00

like i said previously,
its going to be a messy year..

i rarely ever get ill
usually i fall sick when
i'm mentally strained and even then,
its not serious
but well anything can happen in life

someone asked if i was in pain,
so i told him that i am
he then asked why i was smiling
i asked him, 'i'm not suppose to be smiling ?'
he told me that i should express what im currently feeling
and react accordingly to the situation instead of
hiding behind a mask
i then told him
'its how i deal with things, a sorta defence mechanism'
he replied,
'that must be torturous, no one will know how you really feel..'
to that i smiled somemore

a friend told me that
'i keep to myself alot
and i build up a lot of walls
so no one really knows what i'm like
if you don't bother me i won't touch you
for me to treat someone nice means
letting my guard down,
removing those walls of protection
and being just myself'
put simply, he means its potential suicide

so i told him
'if something is broken it should remain broken'
while broken things may not be as good as new things,
at least they can't be broken again..

then i realise that somethings, your heart
can be further broken, however impossible sounding it sounds

but then again what is a heart ?
does it actually have feelings ?

i keep telling myself
'its all a state of mind'
but sometimes i don't understand why am i lying to myself,
while other times i feel its absolutely necessary
i sort of grew up on the phrase
' you can either choose to see the world as a funny and happy place
and laugh at it or you can see it as a tragedy and whine and cry about it '

also, i realise if you lie to yourself long enough,
people around you will notice it
and they'll think that its the truth
and nobody but you knows..
i can tell myself and a hundred people
a thousand and one times that i'm fine
but deep down i know im the only one suffering
i'm losing myself..

this would be really funny if it weren't happening to me

blogging blindfolded

2005-01-05T15:55:00.000+08:00

why is it that raindrops, but snowfalls?

are you sure ?

2005-01-02T04:22:00.000+08:00

had a game of majhong just now with my relatives,
and the unluckiest of things happened..
during the last round of the west wind
there were only 8 more tiles to draw
and i ended up throwing the winning tile for 3 people..
yea all 3 gamed at the same time
what a way to start the new year..
cos the probability of that happening
is the same as getting 13 wonders

shiiok

its going to be a dam messy and weird year
everyones going and coming

Which hurts more:
having done something you should not
or having done nothing when you should?

think about it

mm..

2004-12-28T01:38:00.000+08:00

i've seen all the people i wanted to see today
i've done almost all i wanted to do
i've said almost all i wanted to say
i've laughed all i wanted to

sorry if i can't go,
its never ending

if you can't convince them, confuse them
and like a saturday night,
i'll be gone..

do dreams come true ?

2004-12-24T01:55:00.000+08:00

yester-night i had this pretty disturbing dream..
it goes roughly like this..
'i enter a lift.. i take a look around and see that there are people in the lift round me
the lift feels like its going up.. but it sudden stops..
then the lift begins to darken.. so i go over and take a look at the control panel
but its jammed.. suddenly the lift starts to descent..
i take a look at the level indicator and note a double digit figure,
but i can't read the number cause it starts to blur..
i can feel the lift plunging at an increasingly increasing speed
and at the same time
i notice that the level indicator thingy is descreaing rapidly
i'm losing my balance so i try to stabilise myself,
when all of a sudden theres this great impact..'
and the dream cuts off as suddenly as it had begun

when i woke at this point..
my heart was pounding extremely fast
and it took a few mins to slow it down
during this period of time,
i was staring at the ceiling in shock realisation..
i realised.. i had witnessed my death

"A widespread old wives tale is that when you dream of your own death, you will soon die."

everybody is just figments of my imagination.

enter.. the maze.. muahhaha of doom ! *giiggles

2004-12-21T01:33:00.000+08:00

god my place has becomed so messy
i can't find my bed, it feels more like browns boxes heaven..

- warning -

explicit pictures of brown boxes and messy images ahead..

brace yourself.. or cover your eyes NOW!

your mission.. should you decide to accept it..
: is to recover the yellow book like object for lunch located somewhere in the mess !

the labyrinth - stage 1
:welcome, pass the doors into hell !

yes thats how wide the walkway is..
one false step, and you might trip over the yellow small kid like chair of doom !
resulting in a lost of health points! rARRR!

tip101: watch where you place your hand for support !
one false placement, and an avalanche of brown boxes of doom!

the hallway - area 2
could the book be in the kitchen ?
but the entrance is blocked of by a low lying sofa and 2 book like objects,
and a hell load of brown boxes ! ... of doom !
tip 102: to part sofa you must first read the two book like thingies.. the hoorror !

mm nothing edible.. i meant : no sign of objective sir ! whatever it is sir !

more brown boxes of... heheehee yup!.. DOOM ! rARRR!

the room - section (3-2-1)+3/1
mm where art thy brown boxes ? ... OF DOOM !
woo ! book like thingy spotted ! we now have lunch ! les get outta eere !

tip 103(yea so what if i added 100 to the no. of tips): when you have lunch in hand.. RNU ~!
rARRRR!

kao.. my right eyes still twitching
i think someone casted a hex upon me

life is a car wash.. and i'm on a bicycle.

this is good

2004-12-13T05:29:00.000+08:00

To do is to be [Descartes]. To be is to do [Voltaire]. Do be do be do [Frank Sinatra].

tee hee hee : D

love is..

2004-12-13T04:58:00.000+08:00

well today i was heading down to malaysia,

but first,
you know those passport booths thingy
where you have to wind down your window
and pass em your passport ?

yes, no, maybe, whatever, you don't care ?

anyhow,
we were at the booth
so my dad was trying to wind down the window
and my mom heard the clicking sound
so on hearing the sound, without looking,
she takes the passports from the bag
and 'smack' into the window,
thinking that my dad had opened it

everyone had a good laugh bout it
i'm sure you can imagine..

i realise that love is all the lil things,
the bits all add up,
so when 'they' complain with either
its not what you did, its you haven't done..
or
its not what you didn't do, its what you did..
its time for you to kick yourself in the ass
for not realising what you should have realised

love is all the lil bits and the big bits..
wait..
doesn't that makes everything ?
shit i'm back at square one..

anyhow,
love is like a merry little elf who dances a jig,
then turns on you with a machine gun

ouch

"I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life."

don't drink darek

2004-12-12T04:40:00.000+08:00

i haven't been consuming alcohol for a while

these are pretty good reasons man..

this picture should be deemed satanic..

to go with the drinking theme:

i'm not as think as you drunk i am.

you're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

booze may not be the answer, but it helps you forget the question.

Drink wet cement - get stoned.

i don't have a drinking problem. i drink. i get drunk. i fall down.
No problem.

reality is an illusion created by alcohol deficiency.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

i drink to make other people interesting.

i like those at the near the end..

i'm running out of time..

2004-12-12T04:18:00.000+08:00

i know i don't have a lot of time left..
i've included two countdown timers on my side column
to remind myself about two separate occasions,
one concerns my sight while
the other concerns my ,
how much time i have left..

its very depressing... how humans often take what they have for granted
well..
i believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye to it..
time, love are amongst the things that are important
yet are often taken for granted
i don't know why humans are like that..
i'm one of them..

anyhow,
recently i've been discovering cuts
on my thighs,
their pretty straight lines
as though they were knife made
i wonder how..
no, their not self inflicted -_-

what you don't know
you can feel it somehow

why air accidents occur

2004-12-02T08:49:00.000+08:00

i realise i haven't posted anything stupid in a while

soo heres an appettiser,

ah yes
and they say
a pictures worth a thousand words

'ahhhh' is only a single word

kanadeebu. blank. says:
i mean u send me but im like woah. but i dunno wat to say

i believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned - darek says:
huh

i believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned - darek says:
i dunno what you just said

what you don't have you don't need it now

mm ?

2004-11-30T17:18:00.000+08:00

i think i hear something,
i think its saying,

you don't know how lovely you are...

serious man !

2004-11-30T16:52:00.000+08:00

yes i understand now,
why you seem serious that is,

yes, you
right..
don't need to furrow your eyebrows,
tilt your head a lil to the side and go 'hmm'
or look around

its cause... you lack sleep !

smiling ?

haha yea its true
i understand

sweet dreams

you can't let go of something you never had

awww

2004-11-30T15:54:00.000+08:00

bah

no chalet.

anyhow we, 6 of us,
had a makeshift 'chalet' at alvin's house
from the 27th till the 30th, which is today

i slept less than what, 15 hours ?
to make it sound more impressive,
24 x 4 = 96
96 - 15 = 81
wooo 81 hours

welll
least you know if you got troubles
theres someone to call

anyhow, it at one point it got dam stupid
cause there was always one person missing or spoiling
and all those four playered gambling games couldn't be played
there was a point three of us
started playing a game i invented called 'oracle poker'
whereby you ask me a question
and i'll answer by playing poker
it was pretty interesting and damn funny,
whats with you and ladyboys, haha

at one point of time we got soo dam desperate we played majhong
with three human players and a bag of chips
it was damn funny haha, everytime the bag of chips was 'banker'
we deemed it as an auto lost,
and we finished our non-human player in 'one wind' in majhonglogical terms
one time we got soo dam lazy
during this majhong period,
my friend and i got the third player to filp all our cards for us
and the third player ended up 'self touching' himself, go figure
dam funny

i hope the spoiler didn't delete the pictures i took

genuine goodness is threatening those at the opposite end of the moral spectrum

all i have.. are my pictures of you..

2004-11-27T07:50:00.000+08:00

i've been looking so long
at these pictures of you
that i almost believe that they're real
i've been living so long with my pictures of you
that i almost believe that
the pictures are all i can feel

remembering you
standing quiet in the rain
as i ran to your heart to be near
and we kissed as the sky fell in
holding you close
how i always held close in your fear

remembering you
running soft through the night
you were bigger brighter and
whiter than snow

screamed at the make-believe
screamed at the sky and you finally found
all your courage
to let it all go

remembering you
fallen into my arms
crying for the death of you heart
you were stone white so delicate
so lost in the cold
you were always so lost in the dark

remembering you
how you used to be
so drowned you were angels
so much more than everything
hold for the last time
then slip away quietly
open my eyes but i never see anything

if only i'd thought of the right words
i could have held onto your heart
if only i'd thought of the right words
i wouldn't be breaking apart
all my pictures of you

looking so long at these pictures of you
i never hold onto your heart
looking so long for the words to be true
but your always just breaking apart
my pictures of you

there is nothing in the world
that i ever wanted more
than to feel you deep in my heart
there was nothing in the world
that i ever wanted more
than to never feel the breaking apart
all my pictures of you..

great song,
yes i appreciate things beyond face value
no i'm not some metal junkie -_-

songs on the sidebar, go listen to it

songs pretty self explainatory,
poor chap

i can't control the rain that keeps falling..

you..

2004-11-27T07:37:00.000+08:00

you... strange as angels
you... dancing in the deepest oceans
you... twisting in the water
you... just like a dream
you... soft and only
you... lost and lonely
you... just like heaven..

whisper to me what i need to know
and i promise you,
i promise that i'll run away with you
i'll run away with you...

what time issit ?

2004-11-27T07:16:00.000+08:00

mm whens the right time ?
for theres a special timing for every moment

however that timing does not always neccesarily come,
one could spend an entire life-time waiting for its appearance,
only to witness its mis-appearance

and as such,
the greatest secrets are often lost with time..

or rather, a lack of it

or i could be an idiot and go
'isn't time, time? if you want the right time its dinner time'
or err 'tiger time ?'

i wish i knew what the right time is,
being human isn't easy,
cos theres so many rules and emotions and all

to everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under the heavens

did you say fry day ?!

2004-11-27T06:15:00.000+08:00

mm fryings good so long as its food...

few more hours to the 'makeshift' chalet,
such disappointment
guess it was not meant to be, stupid balloting,
now i have shelf what i wanted to...

mm my parents don't seem to be coming back,
i think a year has passed awready,
cos i've grown a beard,
christmas is coming,
there are shirts in my holes
and my stash of food is at critical level..

bah

lest they left me the house,
well when i run out of cash i'll start selling the stuff in my house,
haha

im dreaming im eating some nice lamb chops-

tomorrow, i may not see
nows the time,
the next sunrise maybe too late

don't want the world to see me...

2004-11-25T06:56:00.000+08:00

i'm so beautifully flawed
i'm so human..

i can't fight the tears that aren't coming
or the moment of truth in my lies

that picture by the side bar
is how i appear to most people
no im not crying -_-

this is who i am..

whens day ?

2004-11-25T02:18:00.000+08:00

duhhh, what ?
outtasight man, i lost my calender dude

mm, did you know 3 bucks can get you 5 plain pratas ?

no ?

now you do !

imagine eating 5 plain sugar and curry coated pratas..
yeaa
its suicidal..

mm
im thinking i shot myself in the foot

pictures on my wall are just waiting there to fall

err wait, lemme think bout it

2004-11-24T02:49:00.000+08:00

you know,
if considering the feelings of everyone involved
before taking any action
makes you seem indecisive,

i'll gladly look indecisive.

i hope you understand why i don't appear firm,
i just don't want anyone to get hurt

here i am, built a house upon sand
and i know i've been slipping away
slipping away too fast

day two, or issit three ? err four ?

2004-11-24T02:25:00.000+08:00

i seem to have lost track of the days going by,
i feel like a shipwreck sailor surviving on rations
always deciding between
'rushed cooking and slow cooking'..

lesson, never go to the market in the evening,
reason, all the good meats taken -_-

bah

im the person your mother warned you about
haha

thats nice

2004-11-22T02:50:00.000+08:00

on my self-dismantling window,

b ooger says:
looks like my prediction almost came true

i believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned - darek says:
what prediction ?

b ooger says:
the prediction that u would be the first one to die

i believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned - darek says:
right

if I am
only here to watch you as you suffer
I will let you down..

wooo !

2004-11-22T01:47:00.000+08:00

yea man its only day one and guess what ?

yepp my window fell off

apparently the screws were rusted, and when bringing in the laundry
the whole thing came apart

coool man

If I am
another waste of everything you dreamed of
I will let you down..

salvation!

2004-11-21T08:42:00.000+08:00

woo hoo, home alone for a week
no parents
no family members
no nothing !

yeaaa, and now to make it seem bloody ironic,
the first thing i'll do isssss

sleep.

to tell or not to tell ?
that is problem

priceless, was that the sound of my hearting breaking ?

2004-11-14T06:33:00.000+08:00

DragonflyBlade21:
A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her,
which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend.
This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way.
This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying,
You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you.
We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants.
But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic.
And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you.
In fact, we will never hire you.
But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.

ahh, *smaasshhh*, is everything clearer now ? ; )

kill me while i still believe that you were meant for me-

priceless, playing with fire

2004-11-14T06:29:00.000+08:00

DaZE:
at my school.. the cop from DARE passed around 3 joints to show everyone...
and he said
"if i dont get all three of these back this schools getting locked down
and everyones getting searched till i find it.."
and like 30 minutes later when everyone got to see 'em and they got passed back the cop had 4

mm playing with fire, provoking a cop...itching to get burnt, cool..

may a sickness come and set me free -

priceless, a 'polite' arguement

2004-11-14T06:23:00.000+08:00

Donut[AFK]: HEY EURAKARTE
Donut[AFK]: INSULT
Eurakarte: RETORT
Donut[AFK]: COUNTER-RETORT
Eurakarte: QUESTIONING OF SEXUAL PREFERENCE
Donut[AFK]: SUGGESTION TO SHUT THE FUCK UP
Eurakarte: NOTATION THAT YOU CREATE A VACUUM
Donut[AFK]: RIPOSTE
Donut[AFK]: ADDON RIPOSTE
Eurakarte: COUNTER-RIPOSTE
Donut[AFK]: COUNTER-COUNTER RIPOSTE
Eurakarte: NONSENSICAL STATEMENT INVOLVING PLANKTON
Miles_Prower: RESPONSE TO RANDOM STATEMENT AND THREAT TO BAN OPPOSING SIDES
Eurakarte: WORDS OF PRAISE FOR FISHFOOD
Miles_Prowe:> ACKNOWLEDGEMENT AND ACCEPTENCE OF TERMS

mm so this is a civilised arguement

and if its healthier to leave you be-

priceless, why potatoes are better than roses

2004-11-14T06:14:00.000+08:00

IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons
IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks
IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water
IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying
IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"
IronChef Foicite: but a potato!
IronChef Foicite: potatos last for fucking ever, man
IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow shit even if you just leave them in the sack
IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol
IronChef Foicite: but there's more!
IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it!
IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you"
IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you"

yeaa, i'll send potatoes to girls next time, they have been warned !

'collect' lines to form a paragraph with help from the next few lines at the bottem -

quiet is my loudest cry
wouldn't wanna wake the eyes that make me melt inside -

you..idiot..

2004-11-13T23:49:00.000+08:00

right, my mom and i were having a discussion in the midst of dinner, my dad and lil sister were there too sitting her left ,when my mom was saying to me:

mom : i've got one word to say to you, you should study hard its onl
lil sister (interrupts): mom thats twos words
dad: no, thats more than twos words already

at which my mom looked leftward gave that dam funny stonic (are you idiots?) stare

i'm finding my own words, my own little stage
my own epic drama, my own scripted page
i'll send you the rough draft, i'll seal it with tears
maybe you'll read it and i'll reappear
fom the start it was shaky and the characters rash,
a nice setting for heartache where emotions come last
all i have deep inside, to overcome this desire
are friendly intentions and fairweather smiles..

rARRRR

2004-11-08T04:57:00.000+08:00

rARRRRRRRRR
rARRRRRRRRRRR

epnephiehipnewe wtwp MEOPH[KE[O KEO[ AKY[O KWYKEHOE HEOKHKOSRGKkopkorsgkt w kS RGPRSgS rpgksRGK SgrskGsogmROJMTN<LNM WPT#@K%L A:D

mind tricks

2004-11-04T11:22:00.000+08:00

cool comic strip.. bout a poor guy, a girl, a bad guy and a stupid brother

alright.., but only for you

please continue to exist, im nothing without you

the girls a con artist

down in the dumps

poor kid, hang in there

it shatters like glass

dam, but i still like you

www.sorethumbsonline.com

im not of your kind

2004-10-24T08:40:00.000+08:00

follow the pictures man, most of them are self explanatory

heres me trying it

i did it in the opposing direction

trying on some faces.. somehow i can't look fierce, even if my life depended on it

posing for ninja weekly, mugshot style

dam my hairs not combed and our swords got stolen -_-

look at me, i'm not one of your kind
keep on railing at what I believe
call me insane, I am proud to be
i'll continue walking the other way

sometimes it hurts to be so isolated...does it not..

2004-10-21T05:26:00.000+08:00

Angel of Protection.

What kind of Angel are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

i could hold a masquerade
to show you im not crying
but I can let my tears run away
to show you I'm as weak as a child..

cute girl

my judgement is clouded
i'll probably see much clearer
when im blind...

"i fear not my enemies, but of myself"
- somehow life continues

darek you have... perculiar friends..

2004-10-18T17:05:00.000+08:00

mm had this conversation with an old friend.. thought i put it up to deter youths from doing bad things however FUN they are, not seem... i put are.., its about my friend and a sorta summary of his past.. hahaa

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
we are not so lucky like u guys nowsday

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
we lucky ?

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
since young we learn alots of bad stuff

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
ya

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
ah i see..

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
when we are young we dun not have these type of entertainment u know

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
my cousin was a gangste

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
we used to hang ard with him when we was young.. ard 12-19

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
we go for gang fight etc..

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
ah..

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
do u know.. last time my cousin house .. full of weapons

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
lol

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
got 3 parangs,.. baseball bat

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
haha

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
chopper

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
hooks

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
like some weapon shop..

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
all sorts of funny stuff

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
ya lo

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
hooks = wong fei hong

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
everytime.. got prob.. go his house take barang barang

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
lol

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
HAHA

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
the hook.. like eh how to tell u

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
wah like that must have been dam funny

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
always runnign to his house take weapons

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
haha

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
in school sure carry a panknife

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
ya lo

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
right...

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
my couisn house weapon shop lol

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
then comb ar. all the sharp edges

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
then play with fire crackers

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
all the illegal stuffs

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
lol

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
haha

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
anyway that was my past..

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
anything sharp use as weapon

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
haha

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
after sec...

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
in fact ..

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
its after.. i went in poly

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
.. then when he was in jail

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
then my life changes

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
lol

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
no more place to run to for weapons ?

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
err i mean you realise what is going on ?

zen wanna learn some musical instrument.. says:
now he is a father of one.. tone down alots.. not the gangster cousin i used to know

it is always easier to think back and reflect
than to go through creating the act
- yes me -_-

for my misdeeds, i bled silver blood

2004-10-17T03:11:00.000+08:00

You are Form 3, Unicorn: The Innocent.
"And The Unicorn knew she wasn't meant to
go into the Dark Wood. Disregarding the advice
given to her by the spirits, Unicorn went
inside and bled silver blood.. For her
misdeed, the world knew evil."
Some examples of the Unicorn Form are Eve
(Christian) and Pandora (Greek).The Unicorn is associated with the concept of
innocence, the number 3, and the element of
water.Her sign is the twilight sun.
As a member of Form 3, you are a curious
individual. You are drawn to new things and
become fascinated with ideas you've never come
in contact with before. Some people may say
you are too nosey, but it's only because you
like getting to the bottom of things and
solving them. Unicorns are the best friends to
have because they are inquisitive.

Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

layered discussion

2004-10-14T01:52:00.000+08:00

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
layered discussion

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
exactly

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
haha

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
lol

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
i wonder how political meetings would look like in layers.

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
mm

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
i bet they go something like

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
today we're here to discuss complex matters about complex situations in complex circumstances in this complex world and hope we can come up with not so complex solutions to solve these complex matters in complex situations out of complex circumstances in this dam complex world

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
thats a lot of complexes

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
hahahaa

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
and after that. society will discuss about all the complexities that politics has complexd and the complxities within politics and later politics will discuss about the complexities above their normal complexities

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
and we have earth. the world that goes round and round

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
literally...

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
i sually dont make much sense do i?

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
none of us do, cause life itself is senseless

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
LOL

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
YEA!!

kanadeebu. divert the winter's chill says:
lets go geylang

im talking to the ceiling as my life just lost all meaning says:
HAHAHAH

For everything there is a season
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.

is there really a time for everything ? i don't think so..
why ? why is it human nature to love and treat that person well even if that person doesn't reciprocate, i don't know..

"There are problems in today's world that cannot be solved by the level of thinking that created them"

Back to Before... i wish..., Part 1

2004-10-05T01:17:00.000+08:00

ah yes... good ol days were we used to mess around have fun.. we would use diablo 2 as a form of 'catch up'.. where we also would usually discuss the days events arrange our next meetings during the game.. playing the game was a form of bonding i guess, now we don't do it anymore, im missing the laughter, the arguements,the blame shoving,the accussations etc etc ..

anyhow here are some of the pictures..

haha,
back to before...
i wish..

LOL, I R HITLER

2004-09-27T02:34:00.000+08:00

What Famous Leader Are You?

What Classic Movie Are You?

Fantastic Fags : ATTACK OF THE KILLER HAND PUPPETS

2004-09-27T01:43:00.000+08:00

ah yes life never has a dull moment when your a member of the Fantastic Fags ( for those of you that missed our formation lick here).

heres what happened on one of our recent adventures told from a third person's perpective !
(move and hold your mouse over the pictures to get additional info)
its entitled : THE ATTACK OF THE KILLER HAND PUPPETS

it was a day like any other , a normal one.. the fags were..err gambling..

SUDDENLY ! they were alerted to a call of distress !

it was then the fags assembled !(clockwise from yellow idiot)
Zhi yong: Pokememon, Gerrad: Mr. Furious, Darek: Autistic Wonder Kid, Hua chong: The Incredible Stone
rARRR !

they proceeded to engage the evil killer hand puppets of doom!
and we err... well we mm.. we err ..you can call it a stragtegic retreat.. i stress we are NOT running away

and they err ..got a good ass err..beating.. ...*hand covers face, shakes head*..

BUUTTT OUT OF NOWHERE LIKA FLASH OF LIGHT !! WeEEEEEEee HERE TO SAVE DA DAY !

AND HAHA ! the evil hand puppets from KFC were defeated! and the felines disappear as quickly and they appeared!

once again the fantastic fags are err... what the .... where the hell did they go..

right...somehow for a superhero group, you guys are always doing vices.. but aren't you guys forgetting something ?
yes thats right the frigging cat

SWEET MOTHER OF MERCY.. I DIDN'T MEAN THAT YOU SHOULD OFFER THE CAT ONE TOO..

...... once again the day is saved.. no thanks to these buncha idiots

"First, learn all the rules. Next, list all the rules you choose to ignore."

7

2004-09-26T23:42:00.000+08:00

Main Type	Overall Self

Take Free Enneagram Personality Test

Enneagram Test Results

Type 1	Perfectionism	22%
Type 2	Helpfulness	46%
Type 3	Image Focus	30%
Type 4	Hypersensitivity	62%
Type 5	Detachment	62%
Type 6	Anxiety	42%
Type 7	Adventurousness	78%
Type 8	Aggressiveness	62%
Type 9	Calmness	62%

Your main type is 7
Your variant is self pres

ENTP - "Inventor". Enthusiastic interest in everything and always sensitive to possibilities. Non-conformist and innovative. 3.2% of the total population.

Take Free Myers-Briggs Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

haha

2004-09-23T19:12:00.000+08:00

mm.. hear him sing!

title ?

2004-09-13T01:55:00.003+08:00

heh.. my dad enlighten me on something recently... didn't realise i had this habit of avoiding other people's questions by questioning their questions.. confused ?
no ? well i am..haha anyway heres what happened..

dad: what do you want to eat ?
darek: what do you want to eat ?
dad: do you always answer a question with another question ?
darek : why do you ask ?
*dad shakes head

at this point my mom started laughing, which probably saved me a scolding from my dad.. whew..

"LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations(barbarians) breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient."

-Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

darek ?

2004-09-10T03:48:00.000+08:00

DAREK, adj.
Pronunciation Key (D'aIr~rake)
1.
a. an anomaly
b. something that should not exist by law of nature but does
2. a fool
3.
a. an entertainer
b. one who entertains
4. a mexican wanna-be
5. a 'lame' person
6. one who has a weakness for girls in shorts and skirts
7. one who answers a question with another question

"stop being a darek", "your a pretty good darek", "you darek"--

Source: The Darek® Dictionary of the English Language, First Edition

"on my signal, unlease hell"

cooooool

2004-09-06T04:30:00.000+08:00

if you think your job sucks... take a look at the poor fellow man..what does his expression tell you?.. what if someone goes trigger happy and misses and the bullets end up in his ass ?

worst still his legs are pretty far apart..

why is he smiling ?

"my father taught me to work, he did not teach me to love it"
- Abramham Lincoln

well ab.. between you and me, i bet he wishes his father taught him how to look for better job prospects..poor fella.. wonder if hes married..

"i'm loving it !"
- macdonalds

even angels lose their wings eventually..

2004-09-06T03:14:00.000+08:00

been writing recently and these 2 just came outta nowhere man.. my good friend called them morbid.. i don't know.. what do you think.. their parts of each other yet separate.. confusing ? its my powers..

this is entitled :

distress

this wound on my heart is not healing
because of you, its left reeling..
you're like a bullet through my soul
though i'll never let you know..

though i see you everday
i ask of my fate for another way...
like a bullet through my heart
no matter how near we're apart..

coming down the world turned over
and angels fall without you there
i'll have to go on even as you grow colder
can't give out on reality..

reality is coming down hard on me
now im filled with insecurities..
a pale shadow of my former self
can't save me from me..

battered and neglected...
left tattered and dejected...
im falling backwards
into no one's arms..

this is the other one its called:

pain

this is how im healing, wounded beyond feeling..
flailing like a fish without water
im dead amongst the living
ever letting no one know..

seeing you brings both joy and grief..
is there a solution to this complication
another wound yet im not dead...
so near yet so far..

realisation is dawning
my weaknesses are played upon
im not who i used to be
can't save me from me..

my pains are compounded, i become stranded...
torn in pieces and overwhelmed by pain
im free falling , my world is turning over
and no ones there to catch me when i fall..

these are the pictures of the same angel taken from different angles..
is that how pain is dealt with ?

"my morbid reality
enchanted by delirium
i am lost in a sea of delusion
surrounded by a wave of pandemonium.."
- i just thought of that

as above, so below

2004-09-05T03:00:00.000+08:00

i've been feeling pretty abnormal lately... i don't know why.. mm i guess nothing really matters anymore..

why am i updating you ask ?

i don't know.. i really don't...

Dd?

2004-08-25T01:07:00.000+08:00

overheard : " Life would be a miserable place if we were sober all the time"

Splintered visions, that which once was is now lost

2004-08-25T00:48:00.000+08:00

-you can never come home again

well im not sure who said that originally but im pretty sure he went through that feeling ... to put it simply it means that you can never go back to what things ever once was again.. like you can never go back to the day before after its over..

les take a case study for example to make it more simple..

we were friends since we met, however one incident destroyed that which once was , and unfortunately for that phrase "time heals all wounds", there was simply not enough time to heal this particular wound where splintered visions obscured our sense of clarity..

apologies were dragged when they should have been done swiftly , actions were restrained when they should have been freed..

This would prove to be an almost fatal wound that would heal too late, over a span of 3 long years..

Its not that im not glad the wound finally healed, but after the wound was patched everything..seemed..so..distant.. so.. near yet so.. far.. like scenes from a dream or an old memory, you know how sometimes like in a dream you can remember every word every scene yet when you awaken everythings gone..

I knew all that I was suppose to know yet I knew nothing at all..

familiar faces foreign feelings..

It was great seeing you again..not counting the futile attempts made on catching up with old times.. the presence of formality.. the absence of cussing.. the disappearance of warmness..

Hahaha..(mock laughter)..how I wish I could go to a place far away..back home again..

"I never saw your face and now you're gone without a trace
Except the trace of blood that's deeply scarred into my eyes To fill your place
It'll never be the same but I will love you just the same"
- Pain of Salvation

spot the difference

2004-08-24T22:54:00.000+08:00

friday the 13

2004-08-16T18:46:00.000+08:00

dammit lost my wallet on friday the 13 at a kfc...im never going back there man.. and by losing it i lost like almost all my possessions....hope someone returns it..

actual quotations by actual people..

reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one..